December 22, 2013


Just went to Arby's to go to the restroom while traveling to Canada. First I had to slip and slide down the newly mopped hallway to the restroom. Then I open the bathroom door and there is a worker sitting on the stool. She screams, I scream, and I hurry and shut the door. Me, always saying the wrong things in awkward moments say through the door, "Don't worry, we all have the same parts."      

She comes out and to try to make her feel better I say, "I didn't really see anything." Even though I did. "I just screamed because you did and I thought something major was happening."    

Needless to say, I couldn't look her in the face when I went to order my small chocolate mint shake. (If you are one of the many who like chocolate mint ice cream you know you're a freak about it and at Christmas time mint is everywhere!)

So I turned and watched football stats on the TV behind me which if you know me, that's a joke. The only time I watched a football game was when I twirled Flags for Purdue football and I would fall asleep on my hand out in the hot sun on the bleachers.

Finally, after what seemed like 20 minutes to make a shake, she said it was ready. I didn't know what to say to her, I mean I couldn't say sorry that I saw your whole backside. So I just said, "Thank you." She must have not been too angry because she gave me a large shake instead of a small.

So in closing, if you want free food or a larger size order all you have to do is to see an employee half naked in the restroom. But is it worth it? Probably not.

December 11, 2013

Going to Grandma's House

Noah at the Indiana State Fair
We are going to visit my husband's parents in Canada. It has been probably a year and a half since we've seen them and we are bringing Noah.

To get them prepared, we sent an email telling them to put everything which is breakable away and to lock the cabinet under the sink which contains dish washing soaps. Oh, and to also make sure the knives are put far enough away from the kitchen counter.

You see we have a toddler, plus he is overactive, and he doesn't sit still and he LOVES discovering things which he is not supposed to get into. He loves knives too, but it really is because he wants to cut things. Not people. Like apples and play dough. (Thank God.)

I fear they have no idea what is coming for them.

Noah is adorable. He is lovable. He is hilarious and is sure to be a comedian the way he loves to make people laugh. I love him and he is a mommy's boy. But he is also daring, impulsive, inquisitive, and obstinate.

Yesterday, I went to pay the cashier for his toddler pass to the gym. He took off running down the hallway, not looking back, going full throttle to make it to the racquetball courts. I chased after him, leaving my purse on the counter. Finally we get back and the cashier has me sign the credit card receipt. I let go of his hand and he takes off again, full throttle, for the racquetball courts. "You have your hands full," the cashier tells me. Don't I know it.

I am hoping it is a phase. That when he understands words he will suddenly realize it is not good to run off with abandonment. Maybe it is not a good idea to pull his sister's hair. And maybe it would be easier on mommy and daddy if he didn't scream when people are praying in church. Just maybe he will.

People don't believe me when I say he is high energy. They think, "He is just a toddler." But then when they take care of him, they know. He is very active. I know l00% he will never have a desk job. He is going to be a mountain climber or a builder. He will be going sky diving and race car driving completely for fun. Something definitely outdoors. When he was a baby we would sit outside and he would never, not once, cry. I've never seen a baby take to the outdoors like he has.

I try to remember it will get easier. He will eventually learn to be a little safer. If he ends up having hyperactivity or ADD, it is okay. I had a baby die at 8 months when I was pregnant. Give me a child with any type of problem over having one that dies, it is a blessing.

I just hope things go well in Canada. I hope they are prepared for the little whirlwind who is coming. He is crazy adorable but he is non-stop. It's just how it is. Wish us luck. They are going to be exhausted when we leave.

December 4, 2013

My Story Has Been Published

One of my stories has been published! A few months ago I read an ad on the Indiana writing website calling for submissions for a book they were doing about Indiana state parks. If chosen, it would be published in an anthology containing stories and poems from many contributing authors. Well, I grew up in Indiana and I attended those state parks. I thought, here we go!

The short story is about my camping trips with my dad at Shades State Park. Of course, it is done in my style and includes the harrowing experience I had with a crazy rabid raccoon family in the middle of the night. 

It just came out so I haven't received my copy yet but if you are from Indiana or like to go camping you may enjoy it.

Here is the website and yes, there is my name, Debbie Kollar. Or, you can go on The great thing is all of the proceeds go to help school children visit state parks to learn about nature and wildlife.

Whatever the case, I'm in. I can now say I am a published author in a book no less. I can say I have had an ongoing published column which people actually read. I can say I have had a blog, which pretty much anyone can have, right! I can even say I have had fan mail from my column, well two letters, but they made me feel wonderful. 

Yes, I am a writer. I am not perfect and I am slow going but I'm getting somewhere. I don't know what the future holds but if I want to get anywhere pertinent I'm going to have to work for it. I have never been one for good fortune to fall into my lap.

When I look back on my life there is a continually thread. I still have the poetry book I made in third grade. In junior high, my stories were published in an ongoing column in the school newspaper. But get this, because it will at least provide you with a laugh. They were soap opera stories! As a 7th/8th grader I was writing soap opera short stories about men and women in love. I don't have a copy from back then but I'm sure they are hilarious! 

In high school since I didn't have any money, I made up poems for my sister and brothers, wrote them on parchment paper with a calligraphy pen and framed them. Quite cheesy but I think a few of them still have it. I also had a story published in a high school book which I don't remember writing. When I worked at United Airlines in South Bend, I wrote for the company's newsletter and did exposes on the people who worked there. Then when I went to Catholic Charities, besides doing social work, I had a column in Keenager News. A newspaper which also contained articles from Monsignor Boland and Cardinal George.

You know we all have heard this before, try and find your purpose in life or what you should be doing. I can tell you how and if you don't see it, email me and I will be able to show you what it is. I think God or the universe or something shows us but most times we don't want to listen or see it because we are scared to fail, to succeed, or how much work it will take to get there.

Look at your life and see what threads or connections you have? Maybe you were always good at putting things together, figuring out how it worked, solving problems, and you felt wonderful when you did. Along the way, you won the science fair, you built a bookcase for the 4H fair, you always gravitated to discovering, building, and making things. You see where I am going? From the time we are young, we all have something which we come back to. Like my daughter. She is only 7 but I see her pathway emerging. She always gravitates towards arts and crafts. She watches You Tube for an hour just to learn how to build an outfit for a barbie doll out of duct tape. She will pick an art class or painting over her favorite show and considering how much she likes television, that is saying something. At the parent/teacher conference her teacher notices how great she draws. You see, we all have the answers of what we are supposed to be doing and it started when we were young and in some cases either we forget, our parents want us to go in a different direction, or we grow up and have family or financial responsibilities which preclude us from going down that path. What I'm asking you is, what path were you supposed to take? Only a few are lucky enough to be doing exactly what they want to in life. 

Every now and then it seems something comes along to show me my way. I just have to fight for it, harder than I have been. We all have dreams and many people tell us we can't do it. Most times it is us, telling ourselves, it is too hard. Here is the thing, the hard truth of it all. The more time we wait to work hard for something whether it's to change careers, write a book, get in shape, or take that dream vacation to Paris (anything you really want in life but feel you can't have) the more time passes until we wake up one day and realize how much time we have wasted. We have to continually work harder than we thought we could for what we truly want in life. We only have one lifetime to do it.

It is never too late to be what you might have been.

– George Eliot